Get a Life!

No, that's not necessarily directed at you, personally.  Actually, I directed this statement to myself a few months ago.

Yes, my "shadow days" are over....but that doesn't mean that life doesn't suck sometimes. It does.

Over these past few years, my resolve and determination have been tested, my relationship has been tested, my sanity has been tested. And my vision of the life I want to have has been tested. It has altered so much that sometimes I don't recognize myself in it.

Something had to change.  So I started working with a life coach. Now, now, don't make fun - hear me out. Because it's the best thing I've done for myself in a long time, and, if you want, you can do it too. Our email address is mylifewithpie@gmail.com, in case you want it. After I tell you all about coaching....you just might.

Happy Birthday to Kelsey!!

Just wanted to send a shout-out to my stepdaughter Kelsey because it's her 19th birthday! She's the best a parent could ask for and we're really proud of the amazing person she's become. I can't believe she was only 12 when I met her...it seems so recent, and yet also a lifetime away. Now she's a college student. It's just crazy.

You can read more about Kelsey here.

We're looking forward to a celebratory birthday dinner this evening. Till then - HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! Love you lots!!

Friday Fun: And Now Something for You Sports Fans....

I loved baseball when I was a kid. I watched it on TV, played wiffle ball in my yard, and loved going to AAA games with my family. Anna has expressed some interest too, but I was surprised when she came up with this out of the blue:

Apparently, she learned this at school. Love it! We might just make our first trip to see a minor league game this summer. Play ball! And Happy Friday.

My Shadow Days Are Over Now

I'm a good man, with a good heart,

had a tough time, got a rough start,

But I finally learned to let it go,

Now I'm right here, and I'm right now, 

And I'm open, knowing somehow

That my shadow days are over,

My shadow days are over now.

--John Mayer, "Shadow Days"

This is sort of an epilogue to my two recent posts entitled "Are We Really Born This Way?" If you missed them, please check them out here (Part 1) and here (Part 2).

First, I want to thank everyone who commented on the blog and on Facebook for your support and your kind, loving words. That affirmation means the world to me.

Sliding Gone Awry

How many of you have gone down the slide with your child in your lap?  Yes, I can't hear you, but I'm willing to bet a lot of you would say yes. Fun, isn't it?

Well, it's all fun and games until someone gets hurt.

What not to do....

Support Their Dreams

So we're pushing the envelope a bit more around here, and I just came across something that I think is sure to get people talking. Here we go.

Illegal immigration has definitely been a hot-button issue in politics for some time now. And I'm not here to debate in general the pros and cons of naturalizing people who illegally crossed the border in the hopes of a brighter future. What I do want to do, though, is consider a narrower issue: What should happen to the children of illegal immigrants?

Photo by Shavar Ross, from motherjones.com & flickr.com

Photo of the Week: Nesting!

Happy Monday, everyone! Okay, so it's not completely happy - in fact, where I live it's dreary and pouring down rain. But I digress!

This week's Photo of the Week is one that makes me happy because it's all about the promise of spring. This is a picture of our newly lush green front yard, lovely daffodils.... and birds that apparently want to take up residence in our giant tree, where Anna's swing is located. Heidi and her friend Corrie did some awesome yard work to spruce things up and whatever was left behind seems to have been appealing to the birds, who used it as nest-making material. Love it! Maybe one day there will be baby birds to watch.

Friday Fun: More Silly Stuff

Happy Friday!  Here are a few laughs for you as you wind up another work week.

Anna: "I'll be like a giant someday and eat all the stuff you guys have. I'll grow and grow bigger and bigger and taller until I'm like a giant!"  All righty then.

My nephew:  "Boy praying mantises bite the girl praying mantises all over their bodies to give them bronchitis. Bronchitis makes their brains go funny, then the girl praying mantises forget to bite the heads off of the boys."

"Cough, cough"

 [For more fun with praying mantises, check out the post, "Where Does This Stuff Come From?!"]

Tell Me All Your Thoughts On God

Spirituality is, of course, often a subject of fascination for our kids. It may be difficult to find ways to discuss these issues and keep it on their level, but we do the best we can. It's really cool when they start asking questions about God or heaven or whatever seems to interest them along those lines.

Heidi and I are both very spiritual people and we both grew up in Christian churches - hers was fundamentalist Christian and mine was Baptist - but we're not regularly attending any particular church right now. At some point we both think it might be good to get involved with one again (neither fundamentalist nor Baptist, though) and to expose Anna to more structured spirituality - though in a less rigid way than we were. We want her to learn about diverse points of view and come to her own conclusions because we feel that leads to the most genuine kind of belief and faith.

Photo from dreamstime.com

What Do YOU Think?

You know me, I enjoy trying to get you readers to sound off on various issues, and to share your thoughts and stories. I love hearing them, and so will other readers. And let's face it, blogging is much more fun when people start a conversation. Some of you don't get into that, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna stop trying!

Along those lines, check out this story about a six-year-old girl Georgia girl who was handcuffed and then arrested after a tantrum at school. My first impulse when I read the headline was to be horrified, and to think about how furious I'd be if that were my child. But the behavior was quite intense and apparently, according to the article, even involved throwing furniture and injuring the principal.

Still...does that justify the harsh reaction? I'm still pondering this one, but my thoughts probably aren't half as interesting at your reactions, so........

What do YOU think?

Photo from chimpplanet.blogspot.com

Photo of the Week: That's Amore

Greetings! I hope all of you who were off work yesterday for Patriot's Day, our regional holiday, enjoyed it! Anna and I sure did. We got to hang out with friends and play and stay in the sun just about all day. My arms are a bit lobsterish now but it was totally worth it.

Here's this week's photo of the week. It's a photo of Mama Heidi and me taken by our wonderful friend Patty. I decided to make it the photo of the week for two reasons. First, it's rare that we both look this good at the same time in the same picture and are smiling without weird expressions (usually mine), and my left eye's not drooping, as it almost always does. Miraculous.

Second, spring is a time of rebirth and I certainly feel that happening in our family. We've been through a lot these past few years and are now coming out of a period of struggle into what I know will be a period of happiness and positive change. We are about to realize a dream we've had for a long time - more soon! - and couldn't be happier about it!  Here's to perseverance. It's worth it.

Are We Really "Born This Way"? (2 of 2)

This is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me,

Throw your sticks and your stones, throw your bombs and your blows,

But you're not gonna break my soul-

This is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me, no.

--Katy Perry, "Part of Me"

When we last left our elementary school heroine, she routinely sat in the shrink's office, utterly confused as to why she was there.

Okay, enough with the third person.

I went to counseling on and off for about three years.  And one day, a lightbulb went off. I thought about Christmas, when I was roughly 6 years old, and I cried when my great aunt got me a Barbie doll. I thought about the Herculean effort it sometimes took for my mom to get me in dresses for church.  I thought about how most of my buddies were boys. I thought about how I was obsessed with baseball and played pretend games in which I was a male detective.

"I want to be a boy. I wish I was a boy" rang in my head.

Although it looks like someone else...even I can admit this is cute. (Age 6)

Are We Really "Born This Way"? (1 of 2)

I'm beautiful in my way, 'cause God makes no mistakes,

I'm on the right track, baby, I was born this way.

--Lady Gaga, "Born This Way"

And now for a nature/ nurture presentation from our sponsors. LOL.

Seriously, I decided to write this post today after having read an article posted on Facebook and the comments that followed. The article was about a father's support of his "gay" 7-year-old son. Heartwarming, right?

Not to some people, of course.

Me at Halloween dressed as a Yankee - age 10

Preview: The Scary Place That Is My Psyche

I finally decided to do what I swore I wouldn't on this blog - and that is let all of cyberspace know just how crazy I am.

I know, I know, it's long been painfully obvious.

But seriously.....recent events in my life and conversations I've had have prompted me to begin writing a series of posts about my own process of self-discovery and some of my childhood experiences. Don't be disappointed when it turns out not to be totally earth-shattering, because it isn't.

However, it is deeply personal stuff, some of which I've only confided to very close friends. But reading an article about another child's experience of not fitting the gender stereotype "mold," whatever that is, and the opinions people expressed about that situation, made me want to write more than I have in a long time.

Not only is it good for me to do that for myself, but it might also be good for other people - for people who feel intolerant of anything remotely "different," for the kids who feel "different," and for the parents who feel afraid or disappointed or just confused when their kid seems like he or she might be "different." Maybe only a handful of people will read it, and that's okay - it's good for me to relive things that are hard and to remember how far I've come.

But maybe, just maybe, it would be useful to hear about these things from the kid's perspective. So, tune in tomorrow and Thursday, and I'll tell you exactly what it feels like to be "different."

Mind Your Own Beeswax!

I heard this expression a lot growing up. Everyone's always got something to say - whether they're asked for their two cents or not. I confess I am among the guilty. And, like everyone else, I should probably mind my own business. I do try, I swear!

But nowhere is this social compulsion to butt in more prevalent than in the world of parenting. It's as if having a child guarantees you'll be the recipient of more "wisdom" than ever before. Except there's one problem.

I didn't really ask for it. And I bet you didn't either.

Anna's response to many things these days

Photos of the Week: Chocolate High

Wow.  It's been almost a week since I last posted - which, I believe, is a first in the history of this blog. And it's an event I hope will not be repeated. I have really missed writing!

I hope all of you who celebrated it had a happy, fun Easter..... including those of you who just enjoy it for the chocolate! In honor of all you chocolate lovers, here's our Photo of the Week:

This one cracked me up. I have no idea who gets the credit for it, as I discovered it like some of you may have, circulating around Facebook. But whoever it is, my hat's off to them for the comedic genius.

Of course, I can't resist including one more of our Pie, who loved the Easter festivities even if she felt a bit overwhelmed at certain moments, like this one:

"You said I could have this candy, right? Like right now, in the morning?"

She reminds me of a deer in headlights - she's not sure whether to trust that she can actually have the candy. LOL. Hope you had a fabulous day and there WILL be more to come this week on MLWP, so please stay tuned!

Photo of the Week: A Frog in Her Throat?

Hello all!

I've really been out of commission lately. Too much to do, not enough time, and definitely not enough energy - all of these have kept me away from one of the few things I actually really enjoy doing, and that's blogging.

For the past few days, our poor Pie has really been under the weather. She's caught Heidi's cold/fever/yucky stuff in the nose combo. Anna did rally briefly the other evening, long enough to don her froggy costume and play with her bud Izzy B...but the second wind didn't last long.

I was in the bedroom checking my email when I felt my froggy snuggle into my back. I thought she was just waiting for me, so a couple of minutes later I said, "Okay, let's go play!" .... only to find her totally passed out on the bed behind me.

So here's our Photo of the Week:

It's not easy being green.....