You Gotta Have Faith

Yes, it's a George Michael lyric. And someone else's lyric too, I'm sure. It's probably been restated over and over again in many inspirational publications, discussed in churches, you get my drift. But what I'm learning right about now is that it's one thing to remind yourself to have faith; it's quite another to actually feel and possess faith.

Taking a leap of faith can be very scary. I recently decided to do some contract legal work for a new company started by a friend, and I'm excited about that. I thought this would be a great way to supplement my income and help provide for my family, while still having the safety net of my salaried part-time job.

That was the plan, anyway, until my employer decided that I should go to contract status there too, effectively making me self-employed. In just one week.

I feel sort of like the baby bird who's pushed out of the nest just before she's really ready.

Photo from exploitsofmommyhood.blogspot.com

In truth, I had hoped the contract work eventually would be profitable enough to make it my full-time occupation, but I know it will take some time for that to turn into as steady an income as my salary was. So the idea of suddenly being on a variable income is just a little frightening. Okay, more than a little.

It would still be scary if it was just me, but with a child to think about....well, suffice it to say uncertainty isn't necessarily ideal.

When this happened, I could've been shocked, or frustrated, or paralyzed by abject fear. How will we survive? What if these two contract jobs don't cut it?  Thankfully Heidi is our major breadwinner and is salaried, but still....she can't support us alone. I definitely need to contribute for us to make ends meet.

After I let the weight of this change settle on my shoulders, I did the only thing I could do (besides skim job postings).  I embraced it.

Anna embraces everything!

I vowed to look at it not as though I had been rushed into this situation, but as though it was meant to be, as though it was happening for a reason. After all, assuming I swim and don't sink, being my own boss could really give my family the extra flexibility it needs. And ultimately, it could be more profitable for us.

There are a lot of "ifs" and unknowns, but I'm trying not to feel intimidated and lost. I figure the whole lemon/lemonade thing is important to keep in mind.

Corn maze! Talk about lost....

Anyway, I guess all this is to say that you have to have faith that everything happens for a reason, and work hard to turn every potentially negative situation into a positive one - even if you start by just focusing on your mindset. I believe that our mindset really can shape our reality. Here's hoping my "glass half full" point of view helps me accomplish what I need to for my family.