Why You Shouldn't Hit Your Kids

Tuesday's post about spanking prompted a large reader response and some good discussion, for which I'm grateful.  One thing I love about blogs generally is that they allow for interactions with people all over the place. So thanks for making MLWP more interesting by getting involved!

This issue struck a chord with many people, and to that end, I'm posting an article I found - "Ten Reasons Not to Hit Your Kids," by Jan Hunt.  I'd love to hear your perspectives on the article. It raises some of the concerns about spanking brought up by readers in the comments to the last post. But it brings up other issues too. So before we move on to other issues, please check it out and let me know what you think.

Before I turn the floor over to you, I'll tell you that one thing that really made an impression on me as I've been reading and writing about this issue is the damaging effect that improper or ineffective discipline can have on your bond with your child. Despite all the other valid reasons spanking doesn't work or can be harmful, this one struck a chord with me because I think all of us as parents want to be loved by our kids, but we also want to be trusted. 

We want our kids to feel that they can talk to us about anything.  We want to be the ones who dry their tears and encourage them and celebrate their successes and pick them up after their failures. And relying on physical discipline very well may interfere with that trusting, nurturing bond we're seeking to develop. That alone is reason enough not to go there, at least for me.

Positive Vibration

Ahhh “behavior management.” Our collective blood pressures probably rise a bit when thinking about all the things, major and minor, that our little ones like to do to test our limits… and the gleeful looks on their faces sometimes when they know they are pushing our buttons.

This ranks in at No. 7 on our list of important parental skill areas. So, today we discuss whether we depend on positive reinforcement and only punish our kids when everything else we’ve tried fails.

The Wrong Signals

“Don’t be insecure if your heart is pure,

You’re still good to me if you’re a bad kid, baby.”  - Lady Gaga

Ok, I realize not all of you are Gaga fans, but hear me out.  The above quote is from “Bad Kids,” one of the songs on her new release, Born This Way.  It’s a song worth listening to, but even if it’s not your style, the song does contain a message from which all parents can learn.