The Most Important Purchase of My Life.

We all have our own favorite things to buy.  Heidi is a shoe lover.  I love buying jeans.  Uncle Keith loves anything made by Apple.  For some of us, it’s gadgets.  For others, (with bank accounts WAY larger than mine!) it’s cars.  But recently, on the Macy’s website, I just may have made the most important purchase of my life.   

What’s that, you may be wondering?

Bath towels.

I know, I know, it seems ridiculous.  How important could a bath towel be?  Well, had I read this a few weeks ago, I’d think it was ridiculous too.  But that’s not true for some of the very intense, in-depth customer reviewers on the Macy’s site.  Apparently, for them, buying the right bath towel can energize your life in untold ways.  However, buying the wrong towel, well….for some, there’s nothing so horrific.

See, we were working on our wedding registry.  We chose Target for kitchen and organizational stuff, and we were thinking Macy’s would be good for towels, sheets, and maybe home décor.  It’s a daunting task picking out things for a registry, so I decided to start easy.  How hard could it be to choose towels, I wondered?

I had NO idea.

It seems there are a lot of options out there in the universe of towels, and frankly, it’s a little overwhelming.  Turkish cotton, Egyptian cotton, quick dry, microfiber….it’s crazy.  And some of the prices attached to these pieces of soft, fuzzy fabric just seem insane to me.  

Don’t get me wrong, I have not enjoyed using scratchy towels, and on the few occasions where I’ve been a guest in the home of someone with super nice towels, I do notice a difference.  For someone who has only ever bought towels at Target and Wal-Mart, it seems like a luxury.

Okay, so maybe it IS time for a slight upgrade...

But, one can get carried away.  For example, one brand's  hand towel alone is $35.00. I’m not kidding.  Heaven forbid you buy a full size bath towel – that would be $50.  I’m sorry, but I’m not going to ask our friends and family to spring for towels in that price range when I’m used to and can deal with the mediocre feel of a $6 large bath towel.  I can just hear it now, “Congrats, guys! Here’s you million dollar towel.  That’s right, I could only afford one.  So you’ll have to fight over it!”

And if you think this is a lot of analysis to devote to buying towels, check out the following reviews taken directly from the website.

Review #1:
 I was surprised at the inexpensive price for Ralph Lauren towels, and I was not expecting top quality, but I did not expect this poor quality!!  I had to return those towels since I have never had such thin towels in my life! Not something I would use.  I guess my mom was right, AGAIN....you get what you pay for...

Here, we clearly have some unresolved psychological issues.  Yes, I know, sometimes it can be hard to take our parents’ advice, if only because we don’t want to need it, but let’s face it, they are often right when it comes to this sort of thing. Just go with it, and save yourself money on therapy.

I concede I do care about the softness of Anna's towels....somewhat....

Review #2:
For the love of god, don't buy these towels.  Seriously. I should have known upon stepping out of the shower that first time and reaching for my brand new towel, which I had eagerly anticipated using.  And then I was just covered in lint. And I thought, well maybe washing will help.  Wishful thinking, I'm afraid. I almost had to call the washer/dryer repairman due to the backup of lint after just ONE washing!!   It was everywhere.  Kind of like a lint explosion.  It must have taken at least 7 washes to get it down to just minimal lint - but we could never get rid of it all. It still gets on our other clothes.  I wish I had never wasted money on these towels.  A brand name doesn't get you everything!

Here, we have some intense melodrama.  Reading this, I imagined a lint ball the size of a house.  And describing how many washes it took to reach an acceptable level of lint?  That’s a few minutes of your life you’re never going to get back.

Review #3:

These are some of the softest towels I have ever felt, and I touch every towel I pass (it's an affliction). They feel so lovely every time I get out of the shower, and I love the colors. The toughest decision was choosing a color. Buying these towels was a no-brainer.
 

Among the finer things in life I indulge are good bed & bath linens but I prefer to not spend a fortune for them. Happily, I discovered these Hotel Collection towels, and have been stocking up. They feel and look luxurious but stand up to everyday use and laundering. I prefer white (always looks so clean and fresh) but with just a bit of color for design sake, so I chose the Borderline Collection with champagne stripe…a nice neutral that blends well. Having towels that look good hanging on the rack as well as feel good when put to use really isn’t a luxury anymore…it has become one of my essentials.

What a lovely presentation.

 

Words fail me on this one, folks.  At least it was a good review.  But I don't care how my towels look on the towel rack. I'd also be a little concerned about the compulsive touching of towels.

If you think this foray into consumer reviews was eye-opening, you’ve gotta check out the Amazon.com reviews of the BananaSlicer.  You’ll laugh your butt off.

 

From www.amazon.com

So, next time you buy a product and decide to share some wisdom with other unsuspecting consumers out there, make sure to put as much thought into it as you did school papers.  It could be strangely fulfilling.