It's a Dead Giveaway...

I just came across this article about how obvious we parents are even when we're not trying to be.  From our tones of voice to the contents of our purses to the random stickers we find on our bodies or clothes, we can be easily identified.

For your entertainment, check out this article I found on "The Stir" at cafemom.com, entitled "Ten Ways Anyone Can Tell You're a Mom." I'm betting at least one or two will apply to you!

She got me!

Photo of the Week: My Kid the....Bartender??

Welcome to the start of another work week!  I don't know about you, but sometimes at the end of a stressful day, I like to unwind with a drink. Or sometimes I have a glass of wine with dinner.

Usually, though, I don't have anything because I have a long nighty-night process ahead of me and I'm already sleepy enough as it is.

I will say before I post this photo that I do not make martinis at home. And Anna has never seen me or anyone else drink one.

Apparently, however, Anna has decided that she enjoys fancy "glassware."  For some still unknown reason, she went into our kitchen "junk drawer," pulled out a candle holder (which never gets used either), turned it upside down and poured her vitamin water in it.

Putting aside the other quirky things about this photo - the random bowl of peas still on the table waiting to be eaten, the fact that Buzz Lightyear is missing a leg - what really gets me is not only that this looks like some kind of kid's martini, but also that she's got a self-satisfied smile on her face with that thumbs up. As if to say, yeah, I did a great job with this one!

Weird.

Thank You For Being a Friend

Today's post is a tribute to the best friend I have ever had, my unofficial brother, Ken.  Those of you who know me know how devastated I was almost two years ago when he passed away far too young after a difficult battle with cancer. On this date he would have turned 41.

Ours was a long and beautiful friendship filled with laughter and love and yes, occasional drama. Thankfully, though, that drama was never with each other! For ten years, we supported each other through relationship problems, breakups, family drama, financial difficulties, relocation... the disappointments and challenges of life. But we also celebrated life's triumphs and joys: the beginnings of new relationships, professional successes, career changes, and happy events like falling in love with a beautiful little baby girl.

Taking on NYC, Aug. 2004

Friday Fun: Alligators, Flowers and Deep Conversations

Happy Friday! I hope you all have a great day.  For your entertainment, here are a few more interesting musings on life, courtesy of Anna:

• "Last year I was a girl, and I had a hole in my head from a flower where they screwed it in. But it didn't stay."  Uhh....okay...

• Sleep delaying tactics:  "Mom, I need to talk to you about something important. [Dramatic pause]..... Do you like purple?"

• [Heidi is watching a reality show where people are pretending they're trying to survive in a contrived setting. They find an alligator and kill it. Anna walks in and I cover her eyes because I do not like the idea of her seeing this, given her history with stuffed and imaginary alligators. Thankfully, she only sees the alligator. Shortly thereafter, she sees people eating meat and calling it alligator.] Clearly concerned, she says: "I think the alligator wants to go home to its family." I look disapprovingly at Heidi. Then Anna says: "But how can he go home if he's in people's mouths?!" Ahh, lessons.

• Me: "Anna, I'm having so much fun with you."  Anna: "Me four."

What crazy, silly stuff have your kids been saying?  Let us know. And have a great weekend!

Why You Shouldn't Hit Your Kids

Tuesday's post about spanking prompted a large reader response and some good discussion, for which I'm grateful.  One thing I love about blogs generally is that they allow for interactions with people all over the place. So thanks for making MLWP more interesting by getting involved!

This issue struck a chord with many people, and to that end, I'm posting an article I found - "Ten Reasons Not to Hit Your Kids," by Jan Hunt.  I'd love to hear your perspectives on the article. It raises some of the concerns about spanking brought up by readers in the comments to the last post. But it brings up other issues too. So before we move on to other issues, please check it out and let me know what you think.

Before I turn the floor over to you, I'll tell you that one thing that really made an impression on me as I've been reading and writing about this issue is the damaging effect that improper or ineffective discipline can have on your bond with your child. Despite all the other valid reasons spanking doesn't work or can be harmful, this one struck a chord with me because I think all of us as parents want to be loved by our kids, but we also want to be trusted. 

We want our kids to feel that they can talk to us about anything.  We want to be the ones who dry their tears and encourage them and celebrate their successes and pick them up after their failures. And relying on physical discipline very well may interfere with that trusting, nurturing bond we're seeking to develop. That alone is reason enough not to go there, at least for me.

To Spank or Not to Spank?

Yes, that is the question.  When I was reading articles and drafting my recent post on the frightening child abuse statistics in this country, I also began to think about spanking.  As I mentioned then, that's a topic for another day.  Today, in fact.

I will again provide the caveat that I am not necessarily equating child abuse and spanking. Sometimes, it's simply a form of discipline. My parents spanked me when I was a kid - that was before the advent of "time outs" - and I do not feel like I was abused at all.

Photo from corpun.com

But some parents don't just swat their kids' bottoms when they're frustrated. Some hit hard. Some use other things than hands, such as belts or other household objects.

And that, dear readers, is abusive in my book.

Photo of the Week: Cuddle Time!

Happy Monday!

This week's Photo of the Week was taken at bedtime, so that's why it's a bit grainy. But it was Anna's idea for us to capture our snuggle time with the Pink Panther, and she helped me hold the camera too.

Have a great day!!

Remembering Whitney

I believe that children are our future

Teach them well and let them lead the way,

Show them all the beauty they possess inside,

Give them a sense of pride to make it easier

Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be.

--"The Greatest Love of All," Whitney Houston

 *****

Today, Whitney Houston's funeral will be held and the singer's life will be celebrated by those who loved her. Like so many people everywhere, I was stunned to hear that she had passed away last weekend, and saddened too. What really made me sad was the heavy media focus on her struggles with substance abuse rather than her prolific career.

Let's face it, no matter her personal demons - she had one of the most amazing voices ever heard in pop music. Ever.

Photo from www.inquisitr.com

Friday Fun: Guitar Lessons

Happy Friday, everyone!

I've written before about how important music is to me, and about how I used to play trumpet and sing in church choir and all that good stuff. But I haven't yet written about my earliest aspiration, even before my ridiculous astronaut and gas station management dreams (see "My Place in this World").

I wanted to be a Beatle.

1964 Ed Sullivan Show appearance (from dmbeatles.com)

A Different Kind of Epidemic

I recently read an article containing harrowing statistics about child abuse in this country.  Somehow, among the headlines about politics and primaries, financial crises and international issues, this caught my eye.

And it got me thinking.

There are so many "wars" we have going - the war on drugs, the war on poverty, etc. - why isn't anybody declaring a figurative "war" on child abuse? Why aren't we just as appalled by this phenomenon - if not more - as we are about childhood illness and obesity, for example?

The Pie, 2 months old

With Imagination, I'll Get There

Anna's evolving imagination never ceases to amaze and amuse me.

Here is her longest made-up story yet, which she told me the other night. It went something like this:

Holding up a baby doll:  "This baby was in my belly a long time ago. She was in my belly and she almost came out to play with me right before I was born. She came out and I called her Targo. (Confused expression) Do you think she's a girl? I think she's a girl.

"Targo"

Happy Valentine's Day!

We at My Life With Pie would like to add our virtual Valentine's Day greetings to the many others out there, and wish you a fabulous day with your sweetheart, kiddos, friends, family, or all of the above!

Anna made an awesome Valentine's Day card at school:

Photos of the Week: T Rex!!!

Happy Monday, everyone!

As has become my habit, I ease into a new work week by posting the Photo of the Week.  So my affinity for Play-Doh creations is no surprise to anyone. However, I sort of developed a specialty in the area of one-eyed monsters. I haven't really been challenged beyond that.

Until recently, that is, when I was asked to attempt a dinosaur. Specifically, a T Rex.

Friday Fun: Happily Ever After

In light of Anna's new obsession with the movie "Tangled," I thought I'd share some of her comments about it and reactions to it for this week's Friday Fun.

• Anna watches a scene near the end where Rapunzel and Rider kiss. She then says, "That's fun! Let's do that!" and jumps on Heidi with eyes closed to plant a big kiss on her. After we finished laughing, we explained that grown-up kisses are a little different than kid kisses. LOL.

• Me: "I really like the horse."  Anna: "No, I like the horse. And I like the guy. You like the princess." Me: "Yes, I suppose that's basically how it works." ;)

• We are discussing how Mother Gothel is really old, not young, she just looks that way. Anna then says to me: "Don't get older cuz you're already a mom!" Guess that means I'm ancient....

Getting ready to build Rapunzel's tower

Happy Friday!

New Feature: The "WTH" File

So it's time to introduce another new feature to the blog, which I'll call the "WTH" File.  This is reserved for those things our kids do that always leave us scratching our heads and saying....well, ideally...."what the heck."

If (really, when) your kid does something funny, crazy, unusual, or just plain perplexing, send your story and/or picture to us at mylifewithpie@gmail.com. The regularity of this feature will depend in part on your response, and in part on the frequency with which Anna does weird things.

Happy Birthday to Uncle Keith!

We at MLWP want to give a birthday shout-out to Uncle Keith, who celebrates his special day today. Uncle Keith is not only one of my very best friends, but he is also adored by Anna and without him this blog would not exist.

So thanks for being so awesome, Uncle Keith, and have a fabulous birthday! We love you lots!!!

Who's the Hero Again??

This weekend, Anna started watching a movie that's new to us (thank God) - "Tangled," the story of Rapunzel.  We all loved it.

This was Anna's first Disney princess movie, so it was interesting to observe her reactions to it.  The first thing she said was that the old lady was scary, which she was. Then she said with a big smile, "I like the horse.....and (grin deepening) I like the guy too."

Of course you do, I thought. Man I'm going to have trouble when she's a teenager.....

Photo from beyondhollywood.com

Photo of the Week: Inspiration

Good morning!  Well, I hope it's good for you - I know some of you out there are under the weather (as I am), or perhaps tired and frustrated by the outcome of the Super Bowl.

So today, I'm publishing our weekly photo, and it's not really a photo as much as it is a message. I found this on the Facebook page of a blog I enjoy, The Joyful Mother, and I thought it would be useful to start the week here on MLWP with an encouraging thought.  This is something I'm always working on - but it's hard.

Hope your week gets off to a fabulous start!

Friday Fun: Weird Animals and the Humans That Love Them

As everyone knows, yesterday was Groundhog Day.  I rarely pay much attention to this "holiday" aside from thinking about how much I like the movie of the same name.

This year, though, I felt the need to include it in a post and I wondered, for the first time, what the origins of this strange holiday are and why it's such a big deal to so many people. So if you're curious, or maybe just bored at work, check out this explanation from Wikipedia.

Punxsutawney Phil (courtesy of latimesblogs.latimes.com)

Cutting Costs - Help!

As many of you know, I recently entered the exciting yet frightening world of self-employment, where you enjoy a degree of extra freedom but also grapple with the uncertainty of not knowing how much money you'll bring home any given week.

It's great.

I've always been one to seek the good deals, but it's never been as important as it is now that my family is depending on my fluctuating income. So, my goal is to figure out whatever saving/ stretching money strategies I can. I'm going to tell you about a few of the things I do, and I'd really love to hear your suggestions too!

A Love Letter to Your Child

Today I want to share with you a wonderful post from the blog Momastery, which is now one of my favorite blogs. It contains one of the most beautiful, heartfelt expressions of love for one's child that I have ever read. Another blogger pointed me to it after I wrote the heated post, "We're Not Just Your Punching Bag." It was something I really needed to read.

The message is simple: love one another. The Bible says it. Cher says it. Countless other people have said it. But unless you really walk the walk and actually love your neighbors as yourselves without judging them, the words are hollow. The message is nothing without the application of its meaning.

Photo from readingacts.wordpress.com