We've Come a Long Way, Baby!

As everyone knows by now, last week President Obama made history when he became the first United States president to voice support for gay marriage.

I know, I know - detractors will say he did it as a calculated move to help his re-election efforts. Except that doesn't entirely make sense, given that we LGBT folks can be a political hot potato. Many moderate and even liberal politicians are (pardon the pun) closet supporters of gay marriage but don't have the guts to express that publicly for fear of not being re-elected.

Photo from chinasmack.com

Then again, it's always been hard for people in high places to stand up for civil rights at first, hasn't it?

It usually takes the passage of time, an evolving consciousness about the effects of intolerance, a more progressive government, and finally, a few bold leaders willing to take a risk. Once those trailblazers have done so, a lot more follow suit. It's not quite as scary when you're not the leader of the pack.

I don't consider President Obama to be the real trailblazer here....I think his taking this position so publicly would have been impossible were it not for the hard work and dedication and tireless energy put forth by primarily grassroots organizations all over the country. They have been the ones who have, over the course of the last few years, really changed people's hearts and minds on this sensitive subject. I believe his declaration and "evolution" are simply the product of the rather rapid progress our country is generally making on this issue.

Nevertheless, it was a bold move in that it could push moderate or undecided voters who are against gay marriage to back Mitt Romney in the fall. Who knows. It could provide the President a huge boost, or it could seriously backfire.... but thankfully, our President realizes that civil rights trump political opinion. He is now willing to carry our torch, and that is fabulous. I just don't want the efforts of the "little people" behind the scenes to go unheralded. Those local and national organizations work so very hard to make change, and we wouldn't have come so far so quickly without them.

Advocacy in action (from hrc.org)

So, what will happen now?

That's a big question mark. After all, marriage law and family law are typically (notwithstanding the federal Defense of Marriage Act, which will soon be history, I hope) state law issues. Some states outlaw marriage. Some allow it. And some, like my home state, will be deciding the issue this November. You know, people I don't know will get to vote on whether I can marry my partner. Makes sense, doesn't it? *rolls eyes*

It likely will become a major topic of debate as Romney and Obama begin to face off and gear up for November. And yes, it's an important issue. But I hope it doesn't overshadow the huge other issues that effect the everyday lives of millions of Americans - unemployment. The economy. Poverty. Education. You get the picture.

I'm not downplaying the importance of marriage equality, because it is of tremendous importance to so many Americans, myself included. I'm just saying I don't understand why people care so much who I marry when we could be staying out of my bedroom and concentrating on issues, such as economic policy, that actually should be up for debate.

My fundamental civil rights should NOT be up for debate.

Yes, I said fundamental. That was the word the United States Supreme Court used to describe marriage when it struck down bans on interracial marriage in 1967 - another issue on which progress was ridiculously slow.

Some people were uncomfortable with it. Some people didn't like it. Nevertheless, the Supreme Court held that, according to the law, not the "court" of public opinion, marriage is a fundamental right that all people should have - with no distinctions or asterisks in the opinion.

Photo from huffingtonpost.com

Now, it seems that equality for LGBT Americans is the new civil rights frontier.  Make no mistake about it: this is a civil rights issue. Anytime you deny a class of people participation in basic institutions, you are impinging on their civil rights. I am a U.S. citizen. I live here. I pay taxes here. I contribute to my community. I damn well deserve the same fundamental legal rights anyone else has. Not special rights - just equal rights.

I just wish people could compartmentalize their own personal feelings on the issue, which nobody can change, and understand that our laws should not be based on the personal feelings of some people. At its most basic, marriage is a legal contract. For some it is a spiritual or religious experience - I feel a sense of spirituality about it too.

But that is not the legal foundation of marriage. If people don't think the legal stuff matters as much, then (a) why do they care if gays have civil marriages as long as churches aren't forced to marry gays, and (b) why don't they try giving up some of the rights that come with heterosexual marriage, which many take for granted, and see what happens?  Just a thought.

We've been waaaaiiiiting.......

All I can say is, way to go, Mr. President. And way to go, all you amazing organizations that have fought so hard for us. We've come a long way, baby! And we owe it all to you.