Happy Halloween!

Just wanted to wish everyone a SAFE and FUN Halloween!  Enjoy trick-or-treating with your kiddos! (And perhaps enjoy some of their candy yourself....did I say that?!)

If you have great Halloween costume pics of your kids that you'd like to show off on the blog, please send them to us at mylifewithpie@gmail.com. We'll post our Annapie pics soon too. Have a great time!

The Anna-bee, at age 1

Dude Looks Like a Lady: Gendering Parenthood

I am the Dad.  Or, better yet, I am the 1950s Dad.  I work long hours, come home to dinner on the table most nights, and contribute very rarely to routine housework.  I am the major breadwinner and I handle all of the household jobs that require muscle or the use of tools. 

Yet these characteristics are not what make me the Dad.  Rather, it is the relationship that I share with Anna that makes me the Dad in our family.

Happy together, Oct. 2011

Here Comes Another Awesome Guest Post!

It seems that My Life With Pie is really becoming a family affair. I do the writing, Uncle Keith does the tech support, and now Mama Heidi is inching her way toward becoming a regular guest post writer.

Tomorrow we're featuring Heidi's 2nd guest post here on the blog. Here's a bit of a teaser.....have you ever thought about what makes a mom a mom?  Or what makes a dad a dad?  Is it just gender, or is it how we express our gender?  Let's face it, some of us moms aren't the gentle, warm and fuzzy type, and some dads aren't the strong, tough, provider type.  Some moms can be tougher than typical dads, and some dads can be sweeter and more nurturing than typical moms. Sometimes the stereotypes are just plain wrong.

Of course, gender issues become even more nuanced when there is a single parent who has to be both mom and dad, or when, like us, the parents are a same-sex couple.  Some people have wondered which one of us is the "mom" and which one is the "dad." Do we fit into those typical roles?  Should we?  Why is this what people expect?

Please tune in tomorrow as Heidi tackles this complicated and very interesting topic. See you then!

Friday Fun: Out of the Mouths of Babes

I know I've asked you before, but I'm asking again....please send us some of your kids' best one-liners, musings on life, and/or quotable quotes.  We all know our kids can be little comedians whether they mean to  be or not, and I also know we all need a laugh now and then. So please take the challenge and send us your best stuff. Then, MLWP will publish a post featuring all of these awesome "kidisms."

Here are a few of Anna's to get you started:

Even Supermoms Have Limits

So, out of concern that perhaps you won’t “listen” to me anymore if I keep talking about listening, I will make this my last post in this vein (for now, anyway).  And I’ll work on the bad jokes too.

Writing about listening to our limits yesterday, and realizing how little I listen to mine, made me realize that acknowledging our limits doesn’t always mean saying “no.”

Sometimes, it means saying YES.

From elleelleeye.blogspot.com

"Listening" to Your Limits

I usually don’t know what will strike me enough to write about it until the post starts coming out on paper. Apparently, the listening theme I started this week is still speaking to me – and I’m listening! (ha ha, I know, that was bad) – so I’ve decided to continue with it today.

The idea of “listening” to our limits is not a new one. In fact, this is something that busy parents (and others too) grapple with on a regular basis.

So, what does it mean to listen to our limits?

Anna goes & goes until her limits catch up with her!

Listen Up! A Preview of Coming Attractions.

This week, a listening theme is developing in my posts.  It just happened randomly, but I'm going to go with it!

Yesterday, we discussed the importance of listening to our words and tones so that we can send the right messages to our kids.  Today, we talked about how listening to our kids is so important too. Tomorrow, we'll delve into a different kind of listening.

Listening Goes Both Ways

Yesterday, I talked about the power of words and how important it is to be careful with our words in terms of relating to our children.

Today, however, I want to talk about the importance of our children’s words. Just as we need to be careful what we say – and how we say it – we also need to listen to their words, even if it means reading between the lines.

I'm listening!  May 2010

Photo of the Week: BIG FEET

Since this one seems to be such a hit on Facebook, I decided to crown it this week's "Photo of the Week."  We found these at a local consignment store for just $2.00 and now I (and some of my friends!) wish we could find them for adults! They're hilarious and cozy...without a doubt, the coolest slippers I've ever seen.

"Yoda feet" from Star Wars: Clone Wars. But they could pass for just about any monster or creature's feet!

If anyone happens to know where they may have something similar for us big kids, please let us know in the comments!

The Power of Words

"Do as I say."  "Are you listening to me?"  "Pay attention!" "Watch your mouth!"

The power of words is undeniable.  They open doors for us, and sometimes close them too. They are our way of reaching out to others and connecting with them.  Whether we use that power for good, or not-so-good, is up to us.

But nobody is more deeply affected by our words, for better or for worse, than our children.

Happy 40th Anniversary!

Today is a special day: it's my parents' 40th wedding anniversary!  I just wanted to take a moment to commemorate that because these days, that kind of staying power is hard to find.

My parents have always been good role models of what it means to be committed to your marriage and your family.  Like everyone, they've had their trials and problems along the way, but instead of letting it tear down their strong foundation, they let it build that foundation up further.  Through good and bad times, happy times and tough ones, illness and stress and joy, they've stayed together. I hope I am blessed to have the same success in my relationship.

So, Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad!  I am proud of you and I love you!

Since you don't want me to post pics of you, instead, you get this anniversary greeting!

Friday Fun: A Guessing Game

Sometimes, despite our best efforts, things don't turn out exactly as we'd hoped.....which is exactly what happened with my latest Play-Doh creation.  I was fortunate to snag a picture of it before Anna destroyed it, as she loves to do.  Here it is:

The mystery creature

What I want to know is, what does this look like to you, a frog or a turtle?  I know, some of you will say "neither," but what I'm wondering is, if you had to choose between these two options, which would you pick?  Shoot me some guesses, even just one-word comments, and later today I'll tell you what I had intended it to look like. One thing I can say is that this was not it! LOL.

While you're making fun of my poor little "whatzit," Anna's class is going on a trip to a pumpkin patch!  More on that later. Happy Friday!

For Your Amusement

I saw this on Facebook and HAD to share it with you.  Check it out! And if your kids happen to have any amusing art you'd like to see featured on the blog, please let us know!

I'm still laughing. 

Doctor's Orders

"Take some aspirin and call me in the morning."  Okay, so this is a seriously simplified example of them, but we've all received directions from our physicians at one time or another:  rest up, take medicine, no heavy lifting, etc.

Recently, I sprained my ankle.  Badly.  I'm grateful I didn't break it, but it hurts a lot nonetheless.

Mama T's "boo-boo"

Facing the "What-Ifs"

Today I read "Notes From a Dragon Mom," an opinion piece recently featured in the New York Times. This article was written by Emily Rapp, mother of an 18-month-old son, Ronan, who has Tay-Sachs, a fatal disorder to which Ronan will probably succumb before his 3rd birthday.

Please take the time to read this poignant article.  It will make you think. It may make you cry. It will make you go home and hold your little girl or boy tight all evening long. It will remind you to cherish every second you have. 

What if you knew you wouldn't have too many more seconds? How would that feel?  What would you do? How would you take care of your child if you knew he or she wouldn't have a future?  I don't have the answers.  But after reading this, I have the questions. You should read it too.

Seeing Is Believing?

I came across something yesterday about imparting religious or spiritual beliefs to our kids that really resonated with me.  As many of you know, I follow the blog "Single Dad Laughing" (SDL).  Well, yesterday, he posted an excerpt from his book, The Real Dad Rules, about how to share our beliefs with our kids. His thesis is that you shouldn't teach your kids what to believe - you should teach them how to believe.

I discussed this issue when we were examining Robert Epstein's article about what makes a good parent, and his top 10 areas of parental competency, which included religion. I discussed why I disagreed with that in the post, "Losing My Religion," but I also shared a viewpoint similar to SDL's. If you haven't had a chance to check out that post, please do.

Children are Miraculous

It's so true. I just had to share this awesome photo with you. It was posted by my friend on Facebook, but is originally from a website called "The Joyful Mother," which advertises itself as a blog with life coaching and tips for moms. Check it out!

Enjoy!  Then go home and squeeze your kids. :)

 

 

from www.thejoyfulmother.com

Fall Carnival Fun Anytime!

Last weekend, Anna’s day care held a Fall Carnival. It was our first such undertaking, and I enjoyed being a part of the planning. 

We decided to have about 10 kids’ games, art stations like mask making and decorating paper pumpkins, a photo booth, a yard sale table, and a bouncy house.  Of course, we also needed food, so we decided to serve hot dogs, apple cider, cotton candy and other light refreshments.

As the event drew closer, I wondered how we were going to get everything accomplished with just the small number of parent volunteers we had. But we did it! I was very proud of the way it turned out, and all the kids had a great time.

Action shot in the bouncy house!

Photo of the Week: Sharing is Caring!

Happy Monday, everyone!

So this weekend I decided it would be a good idea to severely sprain my ankle while helping to set up the Fall Carnival we held at Anna's day care. You wouldn't think that would impact my blogging plans....but it did. I have had little time to actually elevate it and care for it properly, and even less time for writing.  I hope to get something else out today, but until then, here's the Photo of the Week, which I call "Sharing is Caring!"

Anna shares her snack with Elmo

Friday Fun: Apple Pickin' Time!

Happy Friday, everyone!  Hope you have all had a good week.

I don't know about you, but I'm enjoying the start of Autumn. I love watching the leaves change colors and feeling the crispness in the air. It's invigorating.

Anna seems to enjoy it too.  She was fascinated by the different colors she saw on the leaves and proceeded to name them all last time we were in the car.  Then she said, "I have to tell Uncle Keith about the leaves and colors!" like it was the most exciting discovery ever! I love those moments.

Tractor at the orchard

It's Unconditional

Blogger’s Note:  This post is written in honor of National Coming Out Day..... for all who have found the courage to live openly and honestly, for all those who are still struggling with that decision, and for those whose families have let them down. You are not alone. It does get better.

Unconditional love. We feel it with our kids. Maybe we feel it with our pets. Hopefully we feel it with our other loved ones and friends too……

……Until we don’t.  Sometimes we have a falling out, a difference of opinion that just feels too hard to handle, and we just stop talking. Or our loved one does something that bothers us so much we can’t feel the same way about them, no matter how hard we try.

It’s always sad when this happens. Unfortunately, though, these cycles are a part of life. 

But one thing they should never be is a barrier between us and our kids.

Trick or Treat...or Tramp?

It’s that time of year again, folks:  it’s almost Halloween.  I’ve always enjoyed this holiday, whether I was dressing up when I was younger, handing out candy to cute kids as I got older, or even going to grown-up Halloween parties with Heidi and our friends in more recent years.

But, as is true of so many things, having a kid to dress up for Halloween changes one’s perspective a bit.

Now that I have a little one to buy costumes for, I notice little kids’ costumes whenever I look at Halloween displays.  And frankly, all too often, I’m horrified at what’s out there.

Photo from merchantcircle.com

Photo of the Week: "Me and You Day"

For those of you who had a long weekend for Columbus Day and/or school fall break, welcome back!  Yesterday MLWP featured a guest post by Heidi, which was an important reminder about the impact of politics on people's lives - especially our kids' lives.  Because I think it's a really important post, I'm hoping those of you who didn't get to read it yet because you were enjoying the holiday with your families will do so today.

So, for that reason, today's post is going to be our Photo of the Week.  Yesterday, Anna and I went apple picking together for what she referred to as "Me and You Day."  Here's a pic of us at the orchard. Usually my self-portraits don't turn out all that well, but I liked this one!  More photos of our apple picking excursion will be featured in this week's Friday Fun post.

Anna & Mama T at the apple orchard

Have a great day!

Yes, Virginia. Everything IS Political.

Blogger's Note:  Today we are excited to feature a guest post by Heidi, Anna's other mom, who just also happens to be a lawyer and a damn fine writer.


The beginning of the end of a very toxic and very short-lived relationship occurred when I heard the following words: 

“What is your problem?  Does EVERYTHING have to be political with you?”

Guest Post Tomorrow!

My Life With Pie will be featuring its third guest post tomorrow! I'm extra excited to announce that it's written by my partner, Heidi.  Everyone who knows her well knows she's a fabulous writer and a passionate advocate. A former teenage single mom turned lawyer, she has a unique perspective to share. 

Have you ever thought about the impact of politicians' decisions on our lives?  If not, you should - especially those of us who are parents.  Parents have even more reason to pay close attention to what goes on around us because our kids' future is at stake. Please check out the post tomorrow and get in on the discussion!

Occupy Sesame Street

Thought I'd share this photo from my friend Jack for your weekend amusement!

Friday Fun: More Anna-Isms

Since it’s been awhile, here are some recent quotable quotes for your reading pleasure.  Happy Friday! 

Happy Friday from the Pie!

The Wisdom and Legacy of Steve Jobs

Everyone, myself included, seems to be mourning the loss of Apple co-founder Steve Jobs, a man who led a technological revolution for which we're all grateful.  My daily routine would be a lot different without my iPhone, iPod, iPad and Macbook Pro. I'm sure the same is true of many of you.

But what's really remarkable is that so many people are realizing what an amazing person Steve Jobs was, with an amazing and inspiring attitude as he fought cancer and faced death.  Fortunately for us, he shared some really wonderful stuff - besides all those awesome gadgets - with the world, and I wanted to share some of that wisdom with you.

Photo from lisenstromberg.wordpress.com

Spoiled Rotten?

We’ve all heard this expression.  I know those adjectives were used to describe me – accurately, I suppose – on more than one occasion when I was a child.

Mini-me, circa 1980.

I recently read an article about so-called “spoiled” children.  It really got under my skin because it wasn’t about kids who have fifteen different Barbie dolls or mountains of toys. It was about kids…. whose parents console them when they cry and pay attention to them when they seek it.

That’s what it means to be spoiled?  I think not.

Imperfectly

“I'm okay, if you get me at a good angle
and you're okay, in the right sort of light
and we don't look like pages from a magazine
but that's all right - that's all right.”

--“Imperfectly,” Ani DiFranco

Single Dad Laughing (SDL) has done it again: he has shared a blog post that really challenged me and forced me to take a good hard look at things. I think you should too.

I have LOTS of imperfections!

He recently commemorated the one-year anniversary of one of his most important and most widely read posts, “The Disease Called Perfection.”  I had read it a long time ago but decided to do so again. I’m glad I did. And I recommend that you do the same. You can read the original post here, and then check out his anniversary follow-up here.

Photo of the Week: Hello!

For your rainy-day afternoon amusement.  It speaks for itself!

The Kingdom of "No"

Sounds like a fairy tale is getting ready to start, doesn’t it?  Hardly.

As I discussed yesterday, we’ve entered the “terrible 3s” with a vengeance.  When I picked Anna up from school yesterday, and she was SO happy to see me, I thought perhaps I’d overreacted in my “terrible 3s” post.

And then there was the Ord incident.

Ord flying with Max from "Dragon Tales"

Is It Really the Terrible 3s??

All my life I've heard the expression "the terrible 2s."  One associates total meltdowns, sobbing hysterics, and general misery with this phrase.

However, I found the age of 2 to be surprisingly easy with Anna. She's always been generally easygoing, and I thought either I had an angel or people are just way too melodramatic.

And that's when they told me that 2 is a picnic and it's actually the "terrible 3s."  Excuse me??

Uh-oh.....run!